7 Things You’re Doing Now That your Family Will Remember for A Lifetime: 7 Secrets to a happy home life

613 Comments / Lifestyle, Marriage, Motherhood

The idea for this blog post woke me up at 3:30am this past Saturday, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. What are we doing, and what should we be doing, to create happy homes and memories that our families will cherish for a lifetime? Is there a secret to a happy home life? Have we been too busy to care? I want to share with you 7 things you’re doing now that your family will remember for a lifetime (7 Secrets To A Happy Home Life).

My grandfather passed away on Friday at age 86. My Pop. When someone you love leaves this Earth, all of the fond memories of that person come flooding from all over. Wouldn’t it be something if all of that positivity thrived while they were living? There are 39 people who would not exist today if it weren’t for the love shared by my Ninny and Pop. We could all learn a lot from those two! In fact, they have inspired these 7 secrets and so, SO much more.

7 Secrets to a Happy Home Life

1) The More The Merrier

Now I’m not encouraging all of you to go out and have six kids like they did. (However, they are a huge factor in why I want so many!) What I mean by this is, fill your home up with LIFE! Whether its a station wagon full of siblings, pets who are like family, crazy uncles, loud aunts who let the kids get away with anything, or a few close friends with the best laughs… it’s all gold in the scheme of things.

When your kids are grown, the chaos, shenanigans and the laughter will be what they remember about their childhood. They won’t reminisce on that expensive video game, or the hours they watched TV alone in their room. Surround them with people who love them. Welcome their friends into your home. Expose them to people who are different, and watch them come out of their shells. They’ll remember that.

2) Put Down The Books

I’m a huge fan of reading (like my Pop) and my kids adore so many children’s books. So don’t take this one literally 100% of the time. As a kid, one of my favorite things was hearing stories about my parents’ childhoods and funny stories about my brothers and me. When I’m tucking the kids in at night, I read one or two books, we say our prayers, and I always try to make a point to tell a story of my own.

Sometimes it’s something silly that I made up. A lot of the time it’s something funny that the kids did that day from my perspective (my daughter loves that). And once in a while I tell them stories about me as a little girl growing up with their uncles. It’s sweet to see what makes them laugh and the questions my two- year old comes up with are priceless. There’s something incredible and timeless about passing down stories. If I don’t share them with my kids, who will?

7 Secrets to a Happy Home Life

3) Give Them Space

We have a rule in our house that our emotions don’t get to dictate the emotions of everyone else. This applies mainly to my daughter who is a textbook threenager, though she’s only two. When she starts up a tantrum, by now she already knows, she better just take herself to her room. I don’t chase her down immediately and try to sort it out. Occasionally when I do, she’ll say something like “Mom I jut feel like being mad!”. So I let her be. I tell her “Okay. When you feel like being happy come back and see us. Love you!” and she’s usually back out and playing within five minutes.

Just because we live together doesn’t mean we have to spend every second down each others throats. All of us get our space when we need it, as long as it’s possible. It makes coming together for family time all the more enjoyable. And the independence that kids feel playing by themselves is amazing for their development and creativity.

4) Play!

This totally applies even if you don’t have kids! A happy home is one where you can be yourself. Your best self. Laughing and smiling, even if it’s just with your partner… or your dog. I know it’s tempting to spend ages on social media or mindlessly flipping through channels. We do it too!

However, this is one of my favorite secrets to a happy home life. The absolute best part of my day is spent on the floor with my kids playing whatever game or make-believe situation that comes to mind. Play is good for your family’s health. Plus, IT’S FUN! Why do you think kids ask to do it 24/7? If you’re not playing in some sort or fashion every single day, you’re doing it wrong.

5) Show Them What Love Looks Like

I understand that not everyone is in a happy relationship, and DO NOT for one second think that you’re excluded from this one if you’re not with someone. If you’re in a relationship that is not an example for your children of what healthy love looks like, that’s something that you strongly should take into consideration. I will never say that my husband and I are perfect at this. Hell to the no, we’re not. But we try, and we’re growing. And our kids see that.

We kiss in front of the kids every day. They hear us say “I love you” and they notice when we compliment one another. They also have seen us fight, and I’ll never be proud of that. But they ALWAYS see us come together and work through disagreements. They’ll never have to doubt that their parents are very much in love, and that we love each of them endlessly. Seeing and feeling love in a home is the most precious gift. If I had one wish to be granted, it would be that every child in the world could grow up with that experience.

7 Secrets to a Happy Home Life

6) Go Places Together

A lot of parents will disagree with me on this, but I LOVE taking my kids with me to places any chance I can. I work full time out of the home, so the kids spend 5 days per week with their grandparents or their sitter. When I have time to spend with my kids, I don’t care where we’re going, I want them there! The memories they make out of the home are just as impactful as what goes on under our roof.

Not only will they remember all the fun, exciting, (and even boring) outings, the fresh air and change of scenery is good for them! No, it’s not easy packing two toddlers to the river on weekends. Yes, it’s slightly inconvenient to wheel them around Walmart telling them they can’t have something in every single aisle. Church… don’t even get me started. All in all, I think putting children in situations where they are expected to behave is very good for them, and it teaches them how to act in public. Also, the meltdowns and utter shit-show that is my life sometimes make for fantastic stories later on. (eye roll)

7) Take Pictures

I’m over-the-top annoying with pictures sometimes. Sorry husband, sorry family. But every single one of those little snippets of time are just so precious to me! The days, months, and years pass by so quickly. With so much constantly going on, it’s so easy to forget the tiny moments and that’s heartbreaking to think of. We all live with our phones attached to us. It’s right there, and it’s so easy to snap a picture to keep forever.

Why don’t more of us actually do it?! The men in my family despise when someone suggests a photo op. But ladies, MAKE THEM! Men, take pictures of your lady! It doesn’t matter if it’s high quality, or even if half the people pictured have their eyes closed. You’re going to want that one day. I wish I had taken more of my ol’ Pop before it was too late.

7 Secrets to a Happy Home Life

Thanks for reading! I’d love to hear some of your secrets as to what makes a happy home. Comment below, share on your socials, and follow along on mine! Also, go see your grandpa. He misses you.

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